I don’t know what it is about whiteboys and oral sex, okay? But the verdict is in and the verdict says them boys got a whole big lot to learn from their Latin brothers, and especially from the Dominicanos, okay?
I am not a racist, and I am not being mean. I’m not trying to offend, just trying to inform, m’ijo. The Latin man, when he sees a woman spread open in all her labial glory on the silk sheets of his lair, looks her over hungrily, like he didn’t get no - I mean any - food for the past two weeks and you and your glistening, hairy pussy are the ripest, juiciest mango that boy ever saw.
What’s that, m'ijo? Did I say hairy? Yes, in fact, I did. And I don’t appreciate how you get all shocked George Clooney bland-faced bullshit on me when I say it, either. Get over it, okay baby? Because that’s tip number one I want all boys reading this blog to take away from here today: If you want to eat the mango like a real Latin lover, get your JFK Junior cheeseburger ass used to some real mango hair, know what I’m saying?
See, Latin men don’t want their women all bald up in there like children, nene. Huh uh. It’s just all the damn borderline pedophile Americanos like Kelsey Grammer who dig that waxy baby look. Latin men like us beautiful women the way God made us, and that means fuzzy where God made us fuzzy, and coiffed and clean and sweet like candy, and our men are not afraid to get a little extra floss on them back teeth – know what I’m saying, Mister Donny freakin’ Osmond?
Now get flossin', nene. Damn.
